Love them so!

 

105 is the goal!

 

Unspoken Resilience

Puzzle pieces, scattered and broken,
Her mind is like a puzzle left unspoken.

Fifty as a child. A hundred as a tween. 

Two hundred as an adult, it seems now to be! 

Her brain struggles, a routine no one can see.

Her pain I can feel, anchors my heart to hers. 

Wash, rinse, repeat...the same old song we sing. 

Yet her coy smile pushes my patience to do its thing. 

Though her mind is a haze, 

Her voice is now loud, her spirit ablaze.

A fighter, a warrior, one day at a time. 

Her strength I'd love to share, with all sometime! 

Puzzle pieces, scattered and broken, 

But her spirit remains forever outspoken. 

Her will to push on, her strength to fight, 

A beacon of hope in the darkest of night.

-Her mom

Get well soon!

The girls weren't feeling well, so while Dane and I were grocery shopping, I looked around for a cute get-well card. I couldn't find any I thought would make them laugh until I spotted the Valentine's Day cards.

Emma's

M*

Covid?

Thankfully we're all feeling better tonight! Sam woke me at 3 am throwing up but is feeling well now, M* has been eating a ton! She's the one who needs to gain the most!!! Ugg, sleep eludes me! 

My little petri dish

I was woken early by this little one with ear pain. We later found out that in addition to an ear infection tested positive for Strep! Kids are like little petri dishes passing around pesky germs. Of course, a trip to McDonald's after her visit was in order. She is the only person I know who doesn't like the taste of Amoxicillin.

Socks!

The other day, my co-worker noticed how tiny my feet are. And then pointed out my cute black matching socks. She was surprised, in a house full of kiddos I took the time to match my socks. I bit back tears of both laughter and sadness, but mostly sadness. If she only knew the story of what socks in my life mean. 

We used to love to miss-match socks. Now, they are required to enter rooms (an OCD thing). However, socks can be fun and free us from time to time. I'll sometimes throw one over Kiddo's or Dane's shoulder for fun. 

We've received & purchased a lot of socks this year! Time to purge some more, as we are again overrun with SOCKS!

Heaven help them

 Her dolphin bark will alarm heaven when I have arrived. 

Cars!

Unfortunately, the Tahoe was involved in another collision (totaled this time in front of our house). Prompting the black car to step in. With the assistance of Bob-Bob and Gage Auto Sales, we now have a new car. Another task on my "To-Do-list" is advocating for change in our neighborhood by petitioning the City of Gladstone for speed humps.

*Update...The black car was totaled in the same fashion! Yep, I still need to get around to that petition.  

Gage Auto - The best place to buy a used car!

Goodbye old man

It was really hard to say goodbye! I was there when he took his first breath. Dane and I stayed up as he slowly took his last. 

Someday they'll fly!

 

This depression is hurting my eyes! 

Thankful two of my kiddos are doing well. 

ALONE at last!!!

 That was a fun walk! Just Dane and I, no children or pets! Venting to each other about said children and life in general. THEN, we relaxed with God's beauty all around us! 

Horse therapy with Emma & Scooby

Her trainer insisted I do a trust fall! She's heard my breaking heart for my mom and kiddos' recent issues. Scooby is a good boy! Emma urged him to trot into a gallop, scary for me but worth the smiles on her face! 

It can't rain all the time!

Today was quite eventful. Took care of some SAHM duties and helped my mom with her house cleaning. While I was at her place, Dane called me. Eeek... he stepped on a nail while working on the new addition for Emma. He needed some TLC and help finding an urgent care facility that accepted our insurance. While we waited for the doctor, M* and I treated ourselves to Starbucks! After surviving the tetanus shot, Dane continued working on the addition! Ah, the joys of parenthood—'Have kids, it'll be fun!'"

It Can't Rain All the Time

We walked the narrow path

Beneath the smoking skies

Sometimes you can barely tell the difference

Between darkness and light

Do you have faith

In what we believe?

The truest test is when we cannot

When we cannot see

I hear pounding feet in the

In the streets below, and the

And the women crying, and the

And the children know that there

There's something wrong, and

It's hard to belive that love will prevail

Oh, it won't rain all the time

The sky won't fall forever

And though the night seems long

Your tears won't fall forever

Oh, when I'm lonely

I lie awake at night

And I wish you were here

I miss you

Can you tell me

Is there something more to belive in?

Or is this all there is?

In the pounding feet, in the

In the streets below, and the

And the window breaks, and

And a woman falls, there's

There's something wrong, it's

It's so hard to belive that love will prevail

It won't rain all the time

The sky won't fall forever

And though the night seems long

Your tears won't fall

Your tears won't fall

Your tears won't fall forever

Last night I had a dream

You came into my room

You took me into your arms

Whispering and kissing me

And telling me to still belive

But then the emptiness of a burning sea

Against which we see our darkest of sadness

Until I felt safe and warm

I fell asleep in your arms

When I awoke I cried again

For you were gone

Oh, can you hear me?

It won't rain all the time

The sky won't fall forever

And though the night seems long

Your tears won't fall forever

It won't rain all the time

The sky won't fall forever

And though the night seems long

Your tears won't fall

Your tears won't fall

Your tears won't fall forever

My 44th birthday re-do with mom!

Yesterday I had such a fun and amazing time with Mom who is getting her groove back! She spoiled me rotten, and I learned to let her. I loved just being me with the one that brought me into this world! My kids also chewed her ear off on all that she had missed while in the hospital. Next year maybe we'll celebrate at the casino!?

The stuffed mushrooms were delish! 

Busy, Busy, Busy!

It's past midnight, and I'm finally relaxing after a long, stressful day. We rushed Mom to the ER this afternoon due to complications from her gallbladder tube! The ER was so backed up after several painful hours she insisted on being released with an appointment in the morning to have it fixed. Dane cooked dinner for us all, but it didn't go over well with two of our four kids. Hey, at least he cooked, which I was thankful for! I'm worried about tomorrow's hospital procedure with Mom, but I'm looking forward to spending time with her. I'll take her out for coffee and share good company on the way to her appointment. My therapist told me today that change is inevitable, and I need to set aside time for myself. So, I'm looking forward to October...I'll be attending a Christian Women's retreat in the wilderness with my fellow sisters!

She's home!

    After spending almost a month in the hospital, she has finally returned home! We spent some time doing things around the house and then snipped some of her beautiful hydrangeas to take home. Chloe and I loved our time together as well. It was nice to relax and take a breath before returning home to the chaos and sweltering heat! 

Fallen Sandcastles

Missed my ocean wave naps and freezing pool swims with the kiddos. But M* and I survived at home with the critters to keep us company. It's hard being a mama with my heart in two places!

Get well soon!

My heart sank when 2 of the 4 pots the kids made fell off her hospital bed. But then I took a breath and so did she! 

Goodbye baby boy.

"As I write this, our house is so quiet. There is no rushing to potty a little boy (who pees like a girl), no whimpering or barking because I'm on the other side of a door, and no need to make sure food is pushed way back on the island...just silence. However, I did have a mess to clean up this morning as everyone babied Miss Chloe and fed her too many treats while I was gone. Poor girl, we all miss him terribly.