My 44th birthday re-do with mom!

Yesterday I had such a fun and amazing time with Mom who is getting her groove back! She spoiled me rotten, and I learned to let her. I loved just being me with the one that brought me into this world! My kids also chewed her ear off on all that she had missed while in the hospital. Next year maybe we'll celebrate at the casino!?

The stuffed mushrooms were delish! 

Beautiful day at Sisterhood!

Fell in love with this little guy! 

Me time!

Double Digits!

44 years ago, I was born! I almost arrived on the busy Vegas Strip while my dad urged her to hold off. Finally, at the hospital, she demanded the lights off! I was to be welcomed into a peaceful and blissful world. Her first words were not boy or girl..."What time is it?" My father was hopeful she could push me out in less than an hour (bet was a dinner). She won, and I wiggled through fast. 

This year's birthday was anything but peaceful bliss! With Mom in the hospital and family stressors. Chaotic kids, loving animals, and a goofy husband kept me somewhat sane.

Sam won this for me at Bullwinkles, he loves to call me the short Umpa Loompa.

Walk with my number #1 emo girl. We both miss the Finn monster, but walks are much easier now!

fresh picked Brandy rose!

My sisters!

What a busy day! After a crappy night of losing our puppy, I visited Mom at the hospital. Then I raced back home with the things MY family needed. But, since it was on the way, I stopped by the dealership Gauge Auto Sales, and asked the boys for donations. They are always so generous! I didn't plan on staying the entire 3 1/2 hours, but it was the fresh air my soul needed!

This meeting theme-

 FREEDOM! 

My "Brandy" rose I brought for a fellow sister. 

God's rays are shining down!

Sisterhood

 My sisters and I from the Mannahouse! A lovely day to celebrate St. Valentine!!!

fun day for them, relaxing for me!!!!

My in-laws took everyone minus M* and me on the Polar Express train yesterday! M*s got her days and nights flipped, so I took the day took the day to pamper Chloe and me!! I even ate a hot meal at Taco Del Mar, YUM! Unfortunately, the manicure my mom treated me did not survive 😔 Should have left the cleaning to Dane! 😅

Emma's ticket

Celebration of life

 

This was hard day to get through as it was biter sweet. Hard to say goodbye but so thankful for all the memories that family and friends shared of my dad. I have learned so much more about him from others points of views. And as I sit here watching the littles play in the hotel pool, I see that he is in them! Like silly nature of Sam who like my dad liked to live in the future looking for the next adventure or the next BIG fish to catch. 

My Chemical Romance MCR Birthday

I have an amazing friend whose love language is crafts! Last year she made and decorated this Mother War cake and this year drum major from Black Parade. She is one crafty lady!!!

Paradigm

 A paradigm is a new way of looking or thinking about something.

So many things I see a new view of, just trying to grasp what my take on this new picture I've deduced.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradigm

Change feels good!

Insipired by this photo I took the plunge! Colors came out perfect, however I'm now wishing I hadn't cut my hair so short! It used to be this length exactly. 

New hairstyle for 2016

Knowing I needed a hair cut, I let Maddy "trim" my hair. It turned out to be more than a trim.. EEK! It's been 2+ years since I've cut my hair and with Emma's obsession with torturing it, I've decided it's time. Now I just need to decide on my new look.

Forecast seems grim today, see things coming to a head

Too many times though, after everything is said and done, we knew where those twists and turns would ultimately take us, and all too often, it isn’t anywhere nice or comforting but rather, it is a prison of emotional death.

https://beyondthepolicyoftruth.wordpress.com/2015/11/05/why-being-an-infj-is-so-difficult/

Me time!

Time alone upstairs, listening to the littles with Dane downstairs. What could be sweeter? Hmmm... What shall it be tonight?

Born at the wrong time - An old soul

Hair by Emma

Seriously thinking of chopping my hair off. Long hair is easy to just brush and be on my way so I've always kept it long. But I'm thinking if there is less hair to pull maybe it will break Emma and Sam's habit.

My Letterman jacket!

Found this in my mom's closet on Thanksgiving. I barley graduated HS but I lettered in Choir! :)

Say it loud, say it proud....I AM AN INTROVERT!!!

://themattwalshblog.com/2014/03/24/to-the-quiet-boring-girl-in-class/

Click the link above to understand my thoughts on this post. A post written by an introvert who learned to accept his shyness as a gift, not a curse.

That blog post I read last night highlighted what I already know about myself. But has also revealed to me how to feel better about myself as well. I need to stop trying to be someone I'm not! I need to own who I am in every sense. And live my life the way I know will make me happy.

For instance, I've always been anxious in certain social settings. Often I say or do things that I haven't put a lot of thought into, because I haven't taken the time to let my brain work through it. I have an amazing brain, one that is always churning with thoughts and ideas. Unfortunately, lately, I've been filling it with a lot of social nonsense, when instead I could be doing and thinking about things I love.

I love to read.

I love to write.

I love life art in photography.

I love to sing.

I love watching movies.

I love photography.

It's okay that I don't like the same things others do. I will use my brain to pour my heart into the things I love, and life will be more enjoyable. 

I'll pass this wisdom to my kids. I've always told my kids to be themselves but had not been modeling that. As my kids grow and find their own way in this world, I'll be there to advise them. Tell them that whether they are an introvert or an extrovert, they need to always be true to themselves. And also to respect everyone else for who they are too! 

As a child, I watched my mom (an introvert) always trying to please everyone around her, and I know the power of parents to influence who their children ultimately may become.

This journey through life will be a lot easier if I remember Jesus walking beside me. He made me in his image! He is perfect, I am not. The Bible and the Holy Spirit have spoken to me.

Mathew 4: 1-11

The great spirit led Jesus on a vision quest in the wilderness where he met the devil. After forty days and nights without food, Jesus was starving.

The devil said, “If you’re God’s child, turn these stones into bread.”

Jesus said, “Scripture says it takes more than bread to really live. To live takes doing what God says.”

Then the devil took him to Jerusalem, to the pinnacle of the temple, and said, “If you’re God’s child, jump. Scripture says God will send an angel to catch you before you hit the pavement.”

Jesus said, “Scripture says not to trifle God with your stupidity.”

Then the devil took him to the top of a mountain and showed him all the world’s empires, and said, “These are all yours if you sign on with me.”

Jesus said, “Get out of here, Satan. Scripture says the only thing worth doing is what God calls you to do.

At first, I thought this was just a verse to show the need to resist temptation. And it is! But in all sense of the word. The revelation I came away with, is I need to be true to myself. Jesus was not the next passing through pastor/priest (whatever those guys were back then). No, this verse said to me he had to stay true to himself and complete the task he came here to achieve. Dying for our sins and saving our souls. So I too will be true to myself! I feel this next chapter of my life will be more serene.

Funny side note.. now maybe all who know me will understand why I lose and miss place things all the time. I'm not just a busy mom! My head is just filled with too many other things to remember pesky little things like keys!