Life isn't always "Pink Fluffy Unicorns Dancing on Rainbows"

My blog consists of happy moments I want to remember. But my life isn't all....

 I WANT to remember and blog about some of life's trials. The trials that make us stronger and bring us closer as a family.
All 6 of us are who we are based on our DNA and our experiences. It's my job as a mom, and Danes' as head of this family, to model good for our kids. We both came into this relationship with good reasons for our hangups. But when it comes to our family we have to put those reasons aside. Fake it till you make it!

It tells me a lot when the hardest things to model are the very things that trouble my kids. Knowing this makes me try all the more.

Change

Dane and I have always resisted change. Now we're modeling to our children that when you HAVE to make a change, to look for the positive. I'm turning the dial around on my pessimist attitude. Anxiety has always plagued my kids. They're turning out to be worry worsts just like me! :(

Anxiety: a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.

Calm

This one I own all myself. I tend to get upset when things didn't go smoothly. But now I realize that when I stay relaxed about things, that sense carries over to the rest of the family. It amazed me to realize that my mood effects the whole family. So unless I want my bad mood times 5, I'd  better keep it to myself. This change is evolving rather easy for me. The happier my kids are the happier I am!!!

Perfectionism

Dane, Dane, Dane.. or so I thought. Until I spent time reflecting on myself and my parenting.

Sam helping me clean the bathroom one day -

"How's it look mom, I got the mirror all clean." He had a huge smile on his face, he was proud. Cringing, I saw lots of streaks across the mirror. "It looks great, but we've got to get those streaks out." I re-sprayed the entire mirror and cleaned it again, making sure to get the streaks out.
A week later I asked if he wanted to clean the mirror. "I can't get the streaks out like you." :(

So Dane is working on purposely showing the kids that sometimes it's "ok," to do things just "ok" . And I am learning to let the little things go, streaks and all!

There are many things that we as parents model for our kids. But these 3, need much, much, more attention! It'll make this family much happier and healthier. I will calmly wait for this change to come, and be content to love my kids for who they are... hangup and all!

Wordless Wednesday

Dyslexia Shmlexia

I was told in high school that I may be dyslexic. "Great," I thought, "I've got one more year left of school and NOW you tell me this." I've always had a love of creative writing, but from then on I'd put off writing. The few times that I have put words down, I've been embarrassed by how horrible my writing turns out. I want people to read what I've written and be amused, touched, informed, ect. Not frustrated because they can't understand my sentences. 

But I've had so many things I've wanted to say since starting my blog in 2008. So I've decided to stop posting only pictures to persevere my memories, and start adding my thoughts to go with them. Also, to start my quest in become a better writer. 

Here is what I've learned about my writing difficulties. 

Within the field of psycholinguistics, speech errors fall under the category of language production. Types of speech errors include: exchange errors, perseveration, anticipation, shift, substitution, blends, additions, and deletions. The study of speech errors contributes to the establishment/refinement of models of speech production.

Speech errors are made on an occasional basis by all speakers.^[1] They occur more often when speakers are nervous, tired, anxious or intoxicated.  - Wikipedia

Of course there is also the Sigmund Freudian's theory (Freudian slip), where one subconscious inserts the wrong word.

"For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President Reagan. We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex... uh... setbacks." -A Freudian slip by President George H.W. Bush

Back to my writing mistakes.. 

Deletion	Deletions or omissions leave some linguistic material out.[1]	Target: unanimity of opinion Error: unamity of opinion

Deletion is my biggest offender.

My best guess to why this occurs along with other writing mistakes, I believe is due to muscle memory. I learned to type very fast in my short career as a 911 dispatcher. In that position I was not afforded the time to proof read, luckily most words I typed were abv (abbreviated).

I can't say for others, but this explanation makes the most sense for me. Example:

I've had this affliction for a long time, possible due to the fact I type so fast and don't slow down to ensure the correct words are used.

"possible" versus "possibly" - They are spelled similar, thus easy to swap. 

The conclusion of my research.. I don't have dyslexia!

I just have to proofread, proofread, and proofread some more! And learn the basics of grammar and punctuation. Keep in mind readers, I went to 7 different schools! I missed a lot of instruction on the basics. Bare with me family, friends, fellow bloggers, my writing skills are improving. 

SAD

SAD

 (Seasonal affective disorder) is a type of depression that occurs at the same time every year. If you're like most people with seasonal affective disorder, your symptoms start in the fall and may continue into the winter months, sapping your energy and making you feel moody. 

Fall and winter seasonal affective disorder (winter depression)

Winter-onset seasonal affective disorder symptoms include:

Depression
Hopelessness
Anxiety
Loss of energy
Heavy, "leaden" feeling in the arms or legs
Social withdrawal
Oversleeping
Loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed
Appetite changes, especially a craving for foods high in carbohydrates
Weight gain
Difficulty concentrating

Causes

The specific cause of seasonal affective disorder remains unknown. It's likely, as with many mental health conditions, that genetics, age and, perhaps most importantly, your body's natural chemical makeup all play a role in developing the condition. A few specific factors that may come into play include:

• Your biological clock (circadian rhythm). The reduced level of sunlight in fall and winter may disrupt your body's internal clock, which lets you know when you should sleep or be awake. This disruption of your circadian rhythm may lead to feelings of depression.
• Serotonin levels. A drop in serotonin, a brain chemical (neurotransmitter) that affects mood, might play a role in seasonal affective disorder. Reduced sunlight can cause a drop in serotonin that may trigger depression.
• Melatonin levels. The change in season can disrupt the balance of the natural hormone melatonin, which plays a role in sleep patterns and mood.

- taken from:    http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/seasonal-affective-disorder/basics/definition/con-20021047

It's been a rough winter for several reasons. But today (going through my closet clearing out fall /winter clothes and organizing spring/summer clothes,) I realized I own WAY more warm weather clothes. Now for the most part I don't enjoy going shopping. But apparently I shop a lot more for clothes in the spring and summer months. 

Hooray spring is hear!!

Note: I'm sure in 3 months I'm going to be blogging about the heat I can't tolerate. LOL!

Interview with God