Present in the hear and now!

An exert from my vacation post I'm still working on...

After a stressful, tearful TSA experience without my daughter, AND finding out my flight to SNA was canceled! I started over at PDX to hopefully get another ticket and meet the rest of my family. 

I'm not a seasoned traveler. So with a ton of stress, I panicked, worried I would not get on a flight out! Will that guy three rows ahead get the last ticket? What about that family? Hmm... I don't see any Disney swag, they might be safe. My head was swarming with "What if's." I did manage to get a few rows up by asking politely to cut, they could tell I was stressed wanting to get to my family. But politeness doesn't get you that far when everyone else is in the same boat. I then became mindful and slowed down. My anxiety began to wane. I found people-watching at the airport helped get my mind off the "What if's" and I was able to be present in the moment and not stuck in my swimming head. I made good memories in that line! With thoughts of our new puppy at home with Grandma, I turned my attention to the many companion dogs. There was a Doodle puppy who was not being properly trained. Treats to get him/her to stop barking just re-enforces the habit...it barked a lot and peed. The poor owner was clearly stressed out and embarrassed. A German Sheppard puppy with floppy ears flying cargo. He was having a great conversation with the Doodle pup 😆. A spoiled Cavalier-Spaniel flying cargo for the first time. She had a teen owner with Dad and brothers going to enjoy the sun. The San Fransico rescue that was part Lhaso Apso part Havanese (Hava-Apso) SPOILED rotten that old pup.  The family of redheads, whose little boy really wanted a German Sheppard puppy. The extremely grumpy guy who had to borrow tape at the ticket counter to close his package, I hope your day got better! 

Being stuck overnight in an airport must SUCK! A lot of that line consisted of that. They all just wanted to get home for the holidays! And I just wanted to meet my family safely in California!!!

Disneyland 2021!

For Tani

Would have taken more pics, but teens must think your soul disappears with a camera flash!

 

College with a kitty

Pink-nose makes doing school work not so bad! 

 

Leo / Fin / Dog... I'll get a name someday!

 

Oregon City otters!!!

😍🐕✌ 

Oregon Zoolights!

Stress relief kitty!

 

I love this picture I took last night. He's getting quite good a writing and speed typing! Our pets make life more chill and provide lot's of laughable moments! 

Rockin' CCC speed run course!!!

With 24 hours to spare Christian finished his last essay. So very proud of him for pulling off this Christmas miracle!! Now he/we can chill for a week before the trip!!! 

Beavcoons OR Portlandia otters?

In the comments vote. Beavecoon comes from iCarly. 

Portlandia comes from the keep Portland weird show.. Which we ALL miss in real life!!!😜

she's so confused , 🤪

 Updating shots and allergy meds so her little brother can come home!! 

spoon therory

On this day Christian ran out of spoons 😔. Had to stop and retreat...but he then apologized the next day and he got back on the horse again with college essays. I am extremely proud of my boy...I mean manchild 🤗 You try doing 2 essays a day with one arm tied behind your back!! The OCD monster is a B*TCH. 

Spoon theory - Wikipedia

On today's adjenda..

Do stuff, do more stuff, and finish the day with everyone happy. Is it possible? We shall see. I've got an amazing husband, children, family, and friends!

 Glad I can finally have coffee again!!!

Chloe our 5th child!!!

 

Wow look at her smile!

Chloe's getting a brother!! MAYBE

Too fast!!!

I'd be mad too! Mom (me, myself, and I) said we would go to do something today now it's been scheduled for tomorrow if I can, then I got "squirreled" doing something else. That doesn't mean that I don't love him. Sigh...can everyone in this family give me a HOT MINUTE to get everyone on the same page!!!

A conundrum I can type, however, I don't like the pressure. UGGG he's taking a speed run course on nutrition. Great subject to study, but not so great when he suffers from OCD. But hey we're learning a lot of great info! He dictates I type.

Our next family member! I hope!!

 

God's perfect plan. We met this little boy last night. The lady who met with us said that she was once assaulted while showing her puppies, so she now meets in public places. What is wrong with people these days? Back to happy thoughts...Seeing her smile again, that's what everyone's looking forward to!!!

Just Be...

Move forward one step at a time.

Don't think back to past memories.

They'll make you smile or make you cry.

Look around and just be.

Just be here in His presence.

Think about all the people you love...cherish them.

Think about all the people you loathe...pray for them.

Move forward one step at a time.

Don't look back at the hill you've just walked.

Don't look ahead at the mountain you've yet to climb.

Look around and just be.

Just be here in His presence.

Look around at all that's beautiful...be thankful.

Look around at all that's ugly...fix it.

Move forward one step at a time.

Feelings from the past contradict happy and sad.

Feelings in the future look bright but may disappoint. 

Look around and just be.

Enjoy this moment here and now!

Just be here with the One that made all of YOU!

Just be here with the One that wants all of YOU!

Just be here with the One that loves all of YOU!

Your Father, your King, your Savior... Jesus Christ!

When you're weak and look to the past or future,

Just call on Him to help you... Just be.

- Brandalyn Wenzel 

Remind me who I am

Jason Gray - Remind Me Who I Am Lyrics

Artist: Jason Gray

Album: A Way To See In The Dark

Genre: Rock

When I lose my way,

And I forget my name
Remind me who I am
In the mirror all I see
Is who I don't wanna be
Remind me who I am

In the loneliest places
When I cant remember what grace is

Tell me, once again
Who I am to You, who I am to You
Tell me, lest I forget
Who I am to You, that I belong to You
To You

When my heart is like a stone,
And I'm running far from home
Remind me who I am
When I cant receive Your love
Afraid I'll never be enough
Remind me who I am

If I'm Your beloved can You help me believe it

Tell me, once again
Who I am to you, who I am to You
Tell me, lest I forget
Who I am to you, that I belong to You
To You

I'm the one You love, I'm the one You love
That will be enough, I'm the one You love

Tell me, once again
Who I am to you, who I am to You
Tell me, lest I forget
Who I am to you, that I belong to You

Tell me, once again
Who I am to You, who I am to You
Tell me, lest I forget
Who I am to You, that I belong to You
To You

To You

Read more at http://www.songlyrics.com/jason-gray/remind-me-who-i-am-lyrics/#uOxIpDR5ML5qPk03.99

My Meyer - Briggs Personality Type

Characteristics of INFJs[edit]

INFJs are conscientious and value-driven. They seek meaning in relationships, ideas, and events, with an eye toward better understanding of themselves and others. Using their intuitive skills, they develop a clear and confident vision, which they then set out to execute, aiming to better the lives of others. Like their INTJcounterparts, INFJs regard problems as opportunities to design and implement creative solutions.^[12]

INFJs can adapt easily in social situations due to their complex understanding of an individual's motivations; however, they are true introverts. INFJs are private individuals who prefer to exercise their influence behind the scenes. Though they are very independent, INFJs are intensely interested in the well-being of others. INFJs prefer one-on-one relationships to large groups. Sensitive and complex, they are adept at understanding complicated issues and driven to resolve differences in a cooperative and creative manner.^[3]

INFJs have a rich, vivid inner life that they may be reluctant to share with those around them. Nevertheless, they are congenial in their interactions and perceptive of the emotions of others. Generally well liked by their peers, they may often be considered close friends and confidants by most other types; however, they are guarded in expressing their own feelings, especially to new people, and tend to establish close relationships slowly. INFJs tend to be easily hurt, though they may not reveal it (except to their closest companions). INFJs may "silently withdraw as a way of setting limits" rather than expressing their wounded feelings—a behavior that may leave others confused and upset.^[13]

INFJs tend to be sensitive, quiet leaders with a great depth of personality. They are intricately, deeply woven, mysterious, highly complex, and often puzzling, even to themselves. They have an orderly view toward the world but are internally arranged in a complex way that only they can understand. Abstract in communicating, they live in a world of hidden meanings and possibilities. With a natural affinity for art, INFJs tend to be creative and easily inspired, yet they may also do well in the sciences, aided by their intuition.^[14]

The MBTI instrument

The MBTI preferences indicate the differences in people based on the following:^[6]

• How they focus their attention or get their energy (extraversion or introversion)
• How they perceive or take in information (sensing or intuition)
• How they prefer to make decisions (thinking or feeling)
• How they orient themselves to the external world (judgment or perception)

I – Introversion preferred to extroversion: INFJs tend to be quiet and reserved. They generally prefer interacting with a few close friends rather than a wide circle of acquaintances, and they expend energy in social situations (whereas extroverts gain energy).^[8]

N – Intuition preferred to sensing: INFJs tend to be more abstract than concrete. They focus on the big picture rather than the details, and on future possibilities rather than immediate realities.^[9]

F – Feeling preferred to thinking: INFJs tend to value personal considerations above objective criteria. When making decisions, they often give more weight to social implications than to logic.^[10]

J – Judgment preferred to perception: INFJs tend to plan their activities and make decisions early. They derive a sense of control through predictability. ^[11]

-Taken from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/INFJ

Calming Baby Sam!

All of my kids hated being strapped in their car seats! The majority of our trips involved enduring a crying baby in the back seat, which would stress us all out! Well, I found a solution for a more pleasant car ride with Mr. Samuel. While still pregnant, I made a family Smilebox slide show with the theme song "These Are the Days" by Tony Van Morrison. With all the continuous editing and sharing it with family and friends, he must have really come to like it there in my zen womb. Fast forward to when he was born...every time I played the song in the car, he'd instantly calm down and stop crying, which was amazing!

"These Are the Days" by Tony Van Morrison

Dad's funeral speech, I never said (draft)

Everyone knows my dad at a glance, within the kaleidoscope of memories. I hope to hear more about who my dad was today.

For me, I don't remember much before I was 10—just bits and pieces before he and my mom's divorce. I think I blocked it all out because of the hurt at the time. The next 10 years I spent with my mom and stepfather. Summers, I would come to visit. We always made the trip to Disneyland and my beloved In-N-Out Burger. He'd always complain I ate him out of "house & home"... duh, I was a teenager. Sash would always take me under her wing to hang out and chill.

When my oldest was born, I was extremely proud to introduce his first grandson. I shot a video of him and Christian in our living room, practicing how to crawl. I remember that feeling like it was yesterday!

(Find this video/pics)

Again, 2 years later, he was here to watch Maddy crawl for the first time.

(Ditto)

The most common memory is the greeting at the airport... and the saying goodbye, which honestly makes me the most sad. I know you're supposed to be upbeat about someone's life. But what about telling everyone you care about TODAY..."I love you and you matter to me!"

Anyone wanna guess what Sam's making tonight?

fun day for them, relaxing for me!!!!

My in-laws took everyone minus M* and me on the Polar Express train yesterday! M*s got her days and nights flipped, so I took the day took the day to pamper Chloe and me!! I even ate a hot meal at Taco Del Mar, YUM! Unfortunately, the manicure my mom treated me did not survive 😔 Should have left the cleaning to Dane! 😅

Emma's ticket

Pinknose

 Incase anyone wonders why we dyed our MALE cat pink.....

We kept the one
Ragdoll with the soft fur. 

The last time Grandma watched our critters (beach vacay). She got confused about which cat was the outdoor cat. So she tried to push our VERY ANXIOUS Siamese out the back door!!! Since then, she has tried to build trust with our brat Sunny. 

This time around, Grandma has a cataract! So she has to close one eye to see the world, and she's not planning on getting it fixed until after her next cruise at the end of December! So, the kids are having fun deciding what to do about Pinknose when we go to Disneyland. 4 critters to take care of! One funny was to capture a skunk (we have a black cat). Another plan was to innovate a mini cow (Sam calls the dog a cow because she's black/white and sometimes stinks). Dane and I think we'll make do with a big funny poster and stick it to the front door. But with this family, who knows!! 

Feelings at Dads funeral. (draft still working on it)

 I haven't posted since my dads death. I often do this on my blog... retreat, post then retreat again. It's my decision I don't have to write, no one expects me to. Yet.. it pulls me back. I feel a pull to write This pull doesn't connect me to others as I don't allow comments. It's more of a pull to write in a space that others and experience and feel what they feel. I often look back at old family videos and feel an intense love! But those same videos won't feel a inch of love from those who don't have connection to us. BECAUSE we're all becoming disconnected,,  more so now then ever. 

Sam and his raspy voice

How Sam got his raspy voice...

"First, you gotta love this picture! We were at one of Christian's soccer games, and if you look closely, you can see where M* cut some of his hair with the clippers. I took him to have an evaluation with a speech therapist because he has always had this cute, raspy voice. After the evaluation, the therapist turned to me and said, "I can tell you exactly why his voice is so raspy. He's extremely intelligent and projects his voice loudly to ensure being heard."

Christian the graduate... created in Canva!

 

Thanksgiving 2021

Emma last night making some MORE lefsa. The whole extended family made it except for M* and Auntie Lolo. Next year perhaps! 

Tomboy no more?

Not me!!! This salon visit cost us about 100 bucks!! 

Christian's food truck lunch order ;) with idk.. either a bunny or a Kahuna sketch. 

Some spooky stuff

Published!

Emma's first choir recital!

Emma started a new school this year. I am so thankful to my parents who are graciously funding her new Christian school!

Boomer Gazette #7

Boomer Gazette 

When it comes to the saying “21 days to make a habit” I feel like when it comes to ME

with my purse and a cell phone, it’s gonna take several months :) Please be patient!!

Last Week's Highlights 

• Sam and Micheal hung out together and did a lot of walking. 

• Emma played her first-ever successful prank on Sam while I was driving, Sam did not find it funny.

• OMSI with Emma. M* was not happy we left without her. A mix up in communication :( 

• Emma hit her head at school on the playground equipment :( OUCH!!!

• Emma got to ride Waylon & Grandma got to go! Unfortunately, she had a headache the entire time.

• Mom took ANOTHER covid test at Walgreens. This counts as #4!

• Grandma & Grandpa went to the beach… we did not watch Carly this time. 

• Blogged some more!

• Disney on Ice!!!

• Happy 45th Bday DAD/Dane!! I love you more than my heart can ever beat. 

This Week PSA’s

• Ga-Ga is to take Emma for new shoes (she wants me to go along too so we

can pick out good walking shoes for Disneyland.

• Christian DMV

• CAIS PTO mtg at the Wild Hare @ (TIME)

• Christian lunch w/ Grandma

• Pie pick up at 3 pm (date to follow)

• Emma's music program at 3 pm (date to follow)

• Walk with K* (NEW weight loss friend)

This week’s menu    

Sat - Meatless/Sale meat - Fried chicken tenders

Mashed Potatoes w/ brown gravy 

Corn

Sun- (Usually Ga-Ga’s) - Dad/Danes' Bday day ALL DAY LONG -

“love you more than my heart could ever beat”!!

Meal for M* - We’ll bring something back and/or 

 Something nutritious / HIGH CAL

Mon - Breakfast for Dinner 

Scrambled eggs w/ cheese 

On hand - Bacon

French Toast 

On hand - Hash Browns                           

Tues - Mexican - Beef Enchiladas 

Mexican Rice

Refried Beans w/ cream cheese

Wed -  New Recipe  - To Die for Fettuccine

Thur - New Nationality - Beef Stroganoff Meatballs over Egg Noodles

(Allrecipes Five star/change sauce to my own w/ onion soup)

Corn

Fri - Fend for yourself night - Buy Friday deals at Safeway (get next night dinner)

E - Top ramen
S - Totino's Pizza

M - ? Something nutricus / HIGH CAL 

C - California pizza

Sat - Meatless/Sale meat - Mystery Dinner ;)

45!!!

 

Veteran's Day!!

 Better late than never!!

Mommy daughter day at OMSI

As you can see, it's sometimes hard to carve out time for some one-on-one time. But it's so important, as they crave my undivided attention. 

My favorite dino...Sabertooth tiger!

For my BFF Sarah! When I met her, she looked just like this!