Self Care

By nature I can easily take care of someone and give good insights to what others need. But when it comes to taking care of myself I fall short (no pun intended). How do I make MYSELF happy, what does happiness even mean to me? I get so wrapped up in other peoples drama, problems, or accomplishments that I forget about myself. Heck, I even forget to eat some days. I become blind to my own needs, what ever they are. But in the end, when my ear has been bent, problem solved, I am left with myself. Who even is that? Is my cup half full, half empty? Often times I don't even know, I just feel MEH.

(edited from Giving Tree book)

Recently I read some advice that spoke volumes to me.

INFJ Counselor -

"Brandy, you have a precious little girl, she's about 3, and needs your protection and understanding. She may have been ignored and lied to for awhile, but she is always being forgotten, and needs some loving and attention. Do you think you can adopt her? Take care of her this year? Let her know you trust her and she can trust you? Good! Her name is Brandy. Don't forget about her...she's holding your hand right now." 

So much easier to take time to help myself when I look at myself this way. Yes, I can say "NO" to others and prioritize some time for her. Yes, I see her worthy. Yes, I would love to make her happy! But No, I will not talk to about myself in the third person. :) 

Dane would often say to me.... PUT YOUR OXYGEN MASK ON FIRST! It always seemed such a selfish thing to do. Logically I know it makes sense, because if you don't take care of yourself and passout, or in my case burnout, you are not able to take care of those that depend on you. But my thinking was always... Oh it takes 2 seconds, why not just put them first. But 2 seconds turn into 2 more, and then 2 more (4 kids ya know). Before you know it, the seemingly invisible help or advice everyone receives, is burned out. 

If I look at myself as someones daughter, mother, wife, who needs to be taken care of, I think I can do just that. I realize that if I take better care of myself and give myself insightful advice, I am able to stand lovingly take care of others.